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PAVE Podcast

PAVE 011: Fighting your own battles first before you can save others and become a superwoman next door with Upasana Chauhan

Upasana Chauhan

Upasana Chauhan is the founder of Superwoman Next Door. She is an UN Representative  of Manup Campaign, spread across 23 countries to involve men in the battle of Gender Equality. Upasana send me an impressive list of 14 organisations/projects she is involved with including many from the UN, but it would be a too long (although impressive) list to share on this blogpage. If you want to read it for yourself, click here: http://www.womenshealthsection.com/content/documents/Upasana_Chauhan_Resume.pdf

Upasana’s dream and passion is to encourage and empower every girl next door to be courageous to DARE TO DREAM and be her own superwoman to get those dreams. She is on the drafting committee for the Newyork City for CEDAW bill.

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 011 with Upasana Chauhan please click here: PAVE podcast with Upasana Chauhan on Itunes

About your host: 

Alianne Looijenga is an international speaker motivating organizations to effectively help survivors of partner abuse, child abuse and sexual abuse. She is also the founder of aliannelooijenga.com and the Professionals against violence (PAVE) podcast.   Alianne is a survivor of sexual abuse (including rape); partner abuse; and is the mother of twins who were abused by their biological father after a judge granted him visitation rights when the children were three years old.

Alianne is dedicated to the empowerment of survivors of abuse and to support organisations working to end the violence against women and children.

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

1:24 : Growing up in India

2:50 Paving your own path and paving the path for others 

3:15 NGO “I do dare”, ManUp campaign of the UN, Upasana’s career so far. 

7:00 Is there a change within the men of India, about how they view women? 

7:30 How men teach other men about women’s rights

8:00 Losing your identity as a woman when you marry in India

10:00 What Upasana discovered when she was looking for an arranged marriage

12:00 Passing values on to your children

14:50 What drives Upasana

21:00 When women are objects and have no rights

24:00 How do you re-energize when you fight so hard for other women’s rights?

32:00 Why people believe that they are entitled to judge another human being

33:00 Rediscovering your identity

35:00 Female suicides in India 

I can do anything for them, but I can’t go to their homes with them. Because that is a battle that each one has to fight for themselves.

I had to fight the battle myself inside my own home first. Then only I can fight it globally. You have to first fight it for yourself.

40:00 The importance of financial independence

Take that fear out of your body. Throw the fear out. Fear controls you. You get scared what happens if I do this, or what happens if I do that.

44:00 Upasana’s advice if you want to change other people’s lives

46:00 Why your work should not be about you

48:00 When you respond with kindness and love to people who put you down, you include them into your journey

51:00 How we can support Upasana by sharing stories about women who live next door to us.

“Alianne is equally Oprah Winfrey as Oprah Winfrey is Alianne.

You are your own superwoman in your own way doing your own amazing thing. So is Oprah. The only difference is that the whole world knows Oprah, and your neighbor knows Alianne. But is Alianne any less than Oprah? No. And that’s why I started SuperWoman Next Door.” – Upasana Chauhan 

59:00 Initial ending: yeah kidding, we talked further

1:03:00 Get out of that thing that holds you down

Be your own superwoman. Don’t wait for someone to save you. Nobody will come and save you. You will have to save yourself. There is no prince charming. And even if there is, he can come and join you while you save yourself. But you don’t have to sit and wait around. You have to take control.

1:08:00 Being grateful in difficult times, ending. 

TWEETABLES:

MORE ABOUT UPASANA AND SUPERWOMAN NEXT DOOR

https://twitter.com/upasanac?lang=en

https://www.facebook.com/superwomannextdoor/

Superwoman Next Door website

To submit stories to Upasana:

superwomannextdoor@gmail.com

MORE ABOUT PAVE

https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga

Www.aliannelooijenga.com

SPONSORS

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to help us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 011 with Upasana Chauhan please click here: PAVE podcast with Upasana Chauhan on Itunes

 

Abuse, Activism, Gender Equality, PAVE Podcast, Podcast, UN women, Women's rights

PAVE 010: Surviving Child Abuse, Learning to love yourself and Leading by Example with Lisa Cybaniak

Lisa Cybaniak is a survivor of 10 years of physical, psychological and sexual child abuse, by her ex step-father. She is a Success Coach, Motivational Speaker, and Blogger, helping shed the stigma of being abused. She is the founder of Lifelikeyoumeanit.com, dedicated to helping survivors of abuse find their purpose, in order to build the life they deserve.

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 010 with Lisa Cybaniak please click here: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-010-surviving-child-abuse-learning-to-love-yourself/id1203285774?i=1000410384511&mt=2

About your host: 

Alianne Looijenga is an international speaker motivating organizations to effectively help survivors of partner abuse, child abuse and sexual abuse. She is also the founder of aliannelooijenga.com and the Professionals against violence (PAVE) podcast.   Alianne is a survivor of sexual abuse (including rape); partner abuse; and is the mother of twins who were abused by their biological father after a judge granted him visitation rights when the children were three years old.

Alianne is dedicated to the empowerment of survivors of abuse and to support organisations working to end the violence against women and children.

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

1.28 min. Lisa tells about being abused by her ex-stepfather from the age of 2 – 12. It started with physical abuse which was followed by emotional and sexual abuse.

3:50 Why Lisa refused help, felt shame and thought she was to blame for the abuse.

6:00 How Lisa broke the cycle of putting herself down

7:43 The moment that Lisa realised that her thoughts made her life miserable and how books and numerology changed her life.

10:43 Are the skills we required to survive abuse a burden or beneficial in present day?

13:43 What the most difficult decision was that Lisa had to make during her recovery process.

16:50 The importance of being open and honest about your past in relationships. How to honor yourself.

17:43 Coming out as an survivor

18:43 Telling our partners about the abuse

20:43 Breaking the stigma of abuse

22:43 Desired outcome of Lisa’s work

27:00 Leading by example

28:00 Books that inspired Lisa finding her path in life

29:00 The quote that inspires Lisa: “She needed a hero so that is what she became”.

MORE ABOUT LISA AND LIFE LIKE YOU MEAN IT

MORE ABOUT LISA

http://www.lifelikeyoumeanit.com/

https://www.facebook.com/groups/lifelikeyoumeanit/

MORE ABOUT PAVE

https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga

SPONSORS

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to help us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 010 with Lisa Cybaniak please click here: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-010-surviving-child-abuse-learning-to-love-yourself/id1203285774?i=1000410384511&mt=2

PAVE Podcast

PAVE 009: Peace, the Red Elephant Foundation, Gender Equality, and how to inspire people into action with Kirthi Jayakumar

Kirthi Jayakumar is an activist, artist and writer from Chennai, India. She founded and runs the Red Elephant Foundation, a civilian peacebuilding initiative that works for gender equality through storytelling, advocacy and digital interventions. She is a member of the Youth Working Group for Gender Equality. Kirthi is the recipient of the US Presidential Services Medal (2012) for her services as a volunteer to Delta Women NGO, and the two-time recipient of the UN Online Volunteer of the Year Award (2012, 2013).

Kirthi is also the recipient of the Global Peace Prize 2016, from WeSchool, and the Rising Star of India Award, 2016, from We The City India. Her second book, The Dove’s Lament, made it to the final shortlist for the Muse India Young Writers’ Literary Award. Kirthi was recently invited to the United State of Women Summit at the White House in Washington DC, as a nominated changemaker. She is also a Zen Doodler, and her works have been commissioned by corporate establishments, non-profits and art collectors world over.

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 009 with Kirthi Jayakumar please click here: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-professionals-against-violence-podcast/id1203285774?mt=2#episodeGuid=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.professionalsagainstviolence.com%2F%3Fp%3D932

About your host: 

Alianne Looijenga is an international speaker motivating organizations to effectively help survivors of partner abuse, child abuse and sexual abuse. She is also the founder of aliannelooijenga.com and the Professionals against violence (PAVE) podcast.   Alianne is a survivor of sexual abuse (including rape); partner abuse; and is the mother of twins who were abused by their biological father after a judge granted him visitation rights when the children were three years old.

Alianne is dedicated to the empowerment of survivors of abuse and to support organisations working to end the violence against women and children.

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

  • Kirthi suffered different kinds of abuse: sexual abuse, bullying, racism and ethnic violence. It made her empathy driven but it had a major impact. She chose silence over articulation of the things that happened to her with manifestations on her health as a result.
  • How Kirthi transformed because of the New Delhi rape and the wisdom of her mother:
  • You have two options: you can feel terrible about this, you can feel depressed, you can mourn about it, you can do whatever you want, fine. Or you can do this for some time and pick up your life. Whatever it is that you do, remember it is your choice and whatever you choose, I am with you.
  • Kirthi thought deeply for six months about all that happened, learned about alternative healing, read and thought a lot and after six months she gave her mom (on her birthday) the gift of Kirthi’s empowerment and founded the Red Elephant Foundation.
  • United state of Women (9:00 minutes)
  • The secret about how Kirthi can accomplish so much per day
  • Female infanticide (12:00 minutes)
  • Why Kirthi chose fiction to tell her stories to inspire people into action (13:00 minutes)
  • The writing proces of the writer of Dimashq (15.00 minutes)

– Syrian conflict

–  A different approach in thinking about war and conflict

Kirthi’s biggest dream (19:00 minutes)

Why peace is so important for Kirthi (21:00 minutes)

Alianne’s story regarding to health and trauma (35 minutes)

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 009 with Kirthi Jayakumar please click here: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-professionals-against-violence-podcast/id1203285774?mt=2#episodeGuid=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.professionalsagainstviolence.com%2F%3Fp%3D932

MORE ABOUT KIRTHI AND THE RED ELEPHANT FOUNDATION

MORE ABOUT KIRTHI 

http://www.redelephantfoundation.org/

https://www.instagram.com/femcyclopaedia/

https://www.instagram.com/kirthipotamus/

The Doodle Kirthi created for me (I am still humbled to be featured next to these women): https://www.instagram.com/p/BSzC5e8A-R9/?taken-by=femcyclopaedia

Kirthi’s books, including the Dove’s lament and the doodler of Dimashq: https://www.amazon.com/Kirthi-Jayakumar/e/B076V6GJBY

MORE ABOUT PAVE

https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga

SPONSORS

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to help us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 009 with Kirthi Jayakumar please click here: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-professionals-against-violence-podcast/id1203285774?mt=2#episodeGuid=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.professionalsagainstviolence.com%2F%3Fp%3D932

Abuse, Activism, Feminism, Gender Equality, Health, Interview, Mindset, Patriarchy, PAVE Podcast, Personal, UN women

PAVE 008: Polygamous Cult, Child brides, and raising awareness for early and forced marriage with Kerry GibsonPolygamous Cult, Child brides, and raising awareness for early and forced marriage with Kerry Gibson

Kerry Gibson is planet 5050 champion to UN women and the president of EcoCentury Technologies. With support from UNWomen, politcal leaders and activists she raised awareness for early and forced marriage  globally and in North America via the event: Not yet for the dress.

To listen to the podcast you can click the player button above or if you want to listen to the Itunes store please visit: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-professionals-against-violence-podcast/id1203285774?mt=2&i=1000400774077

About your host: 

Alianne Looijenga is an international speaker motivating organizations to effectively help survivors of partner abuse, child abuse and sexual abuse. She is also the founder of aliannelooijenga.com and the Professionals against violence (PAVE) podcast.   Alianne is a survivor of sexual abuse (including rape); partner abuse; and is the mother of twins who were abused by their biological father after a judge granted him visitation rights when the children were three years old.

Alianne is dedicated to the empowerment of survivors of abuse and to support organisations working to end the violence against women and children.

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

1:20 how Kerry became involved with UN women

3:00 getting the reward title of 50/50 champion

5:29 childbrides an north America issue

6:40 polygamous cult bountifall

7:50 rasing awareness early forced marriage via the event not yet for the dress

20:28 How a curious message Kerry received resulted in Wellington Chibebe freeing a woman in a labour camp

28:00 how the mindset of her granddad inspires her to this day, the cause of her believe in gender equality

39:00 The impact of Dolly Parton’s quote: The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.

MORE ABOUT KERRY GIBSON and NOT YET FOR THE DRESS

Kerry Gibson

https://twitter.com/kerryandlace y

www.ecocentury.ca

 

Not Yet for the Dress 

https://www.facebook.com/events/1866892113529209/?ti=cl

 

MORE ABOUT PAVE

https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga

 

SPONSORS

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to with us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

 

Feminism, Gender Equality, Interview, PAVE Podcast

PAVE 007: Olivia Crescenzi; I am that girl, Embracing your authentic self, Shifting girl culture

Olivia Crescenzi is a student at McGill University in Montreal, Canada, about to graduate with a B.Sc in Microbiology and Immunology. Science aside, her greatest passions lies in creating safe spaces for girls and women to embrace and love their true, authentic selves. She hopes to dedicate her life to understanding the human experience, and empowering young girls to stand up and find the power of their voice. Olivia is also a senior intern at I AM THAT GIRL and has been involved with the organization for over two years.

I AM THAT GIRL is an organization helping girls to transform self-doubt in to self-love by providing a safe space to connect and have honest conversations about things that matter. Every day, girls are bombarded with messages that attack what she is NOT and they work every day to help her love who SHE IS; to see that in herself and inspire that in others. This way they are shifting girl culture.

Raising the standards for how girls treat themselves, each other, and the world. By building a community for girls to be seen, be heard, and belong, I am that girl is giving them something bigger than themselves to stand for and creating a healthier, more powerful world.

For listeners with an Apple product: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-professionals-against-violence-podcast/id1203285774?mt=2&i=1000384639381 is the way to go.

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

2:00 How Olivia’s positive upbringing influenced her to find her voice
6:45 I am that girl foundation
7:58 Transforming the epidemic of Self Doubt into an epidemic of Self Love
15:00 unlocking meaningful conversations
17:00 the importance for girls to find themselves and to reckognise how powerful they are
18:41 How Cheryl Strayed and Brené Brown inspired Olivia in her work

MORE ABOUT OLIVIA CRESCENZI and I AM THAT GIRL

https://www.twitter.com/iam thatgirl
https://www.instagram.com/iamthatgirl
https://www.instagram.com/oliviacrescenzi

MORE ABOUT PAVE

https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga

SPONSORS

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to with us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

Activism, Feminism, Gender Equality, Mindset, PAVE Podcast

PAVE 006: Surviver of an Acid Attack, Speaker for UN women, founder of Mahendra Singh Foundation with Monica Singh

Monica Singh

Monica Singh was just 19 years old when a rejected admirer threw acid over her body. It took dozens of corrective surgeries and the life savings of Monica’s late father but Monica battled back to hit her goal: to study at Parson’s and become a fashion designer.

Not only that; but she is also involved with UN women and the founder of the Mahendra Singh Foundation – named after her late father which helps victims of physical and sexual abuse, acid attacks, rape and domestic violence in  rebuilding their confidence and strength on their journey to becoming survivors.  The foundation spreads awareness and mobilize community resources in providing counseling, training,medical-care, and career guidance to survivors in rebuilding their lives.

For listeners without an Apple product with the “podcast” app, please visit: https://soundcloud.com/user-476654029/episode-007-monica-singh-surviver-of-acid-attack-speaker-for-un-women-founder-of-msfoundation to listen to the episode.

For listeners with Apple product: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-professionals-against/id1203285774?l=en is the way to go.

Topics discussed and organisations/events mentioned in this episode:

“So the question is coming; how do you want to pursue your life after that?

Because that is what life is about. Otherwise you could sit and lay on a bed and think about what has happened and why it happened, and you keep reevaluating your life. But you have this opportunity, and how long can revaluation go?”

  • 4:08 Monica’s story; how Monica moved on after the acid attack, going from survivor to thriver
  • 8:00 choosing brain over face
  • 9:40 Becoming a global youth champion and her new hope of becoming a good will ambassador.
  • 13:00 Face of resilience, UN Women
  • 16:00 New projects and the Mahendra Sing Foundation
  • 23:00 Stop selling Acid in the open market
  • 24:00 Repercussions for attackers, justice for survivors
  • 28:00 foolish men around the world, princesses and having a blessed life 😉
  • 30:00 Learning to move on after trauma, channelizing your experiences
  • 36:00 Monica’s love for movies

More about Monica Singh

Mahendra Singh Foundation twitter: https://twitter.com/MSF_joininghand
Mahendra Singh Foundation website http://mahendrasinghfoundation.org/

More about PAVE

Twitter.com/pave_podcast

Sponsors

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to collaborate with us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

Activism, Mindset, PAVE Podcast, UN women

PAVE 005: Empowering women, UNwomen, Ananke magazine with Sabin Muzaffar

sabin muzaffar

Sabin Muzaffar is the Executive Editor & Founder of Ananke (www.anankemag.com), a digital platform empowering women through advocacy, awareness and education. Sabin has two decades of experience in traditional and new media – starting her professional journey in Karachi, Pakistan. She has worked for and contributed to numerous local & international publications including daily The News International, SPIDER, SHE, Dawn, Gulf News, Khaleej Times, ITP publication, BBVA OPENMIND, International Women’s Initiative and many more.

A collaborator and speaker at many events, Sabin was selected as UN Women’s Empower Global Champion for Women’s Economic Empowerment 2915-2016 and is currently an Empower Women Mentor and partner; in addition to being a Vision Mentor at World Pulse.

In 2014, acknowledging the gaping void in the digital realm in terms of documenting women’s achievements and highlighting HERstories, Sabin founded Ananke magazine. The platform not only covers in-depth articles on topics like women’s health, education, STEM, Law, climate change with a gender perspective; it showcases women as role models for young aspiring women. In 2016, Ananke launched its digital internship program for girls that enables anyone to apply from anywhere in the world. Over 30 girls from countries including Pakistan, Australia, the UAE, US, Kenya, Ghana, Nigeria and Turkey have been mentored over the past 11 months.

Sabin‘s vision is provide a platform for dialogue on Women’s Economic Empowerment and how women can empower other women through collaboration.

For listeners without an Apple product with the “podcast” app, please visit: https://soundcloud.com/user-476654029/episode-005-sabin-muzaffar-unwomen-gender-equality-ananke-magazine-empowering-women to listen to the episode.

For listeners with an Apple product: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-professionals-against/id1203285774?l=en is the way to go.

Topics discussed and organisations/events mentioned in this episode:

  • Ananke magazine – an interactive platform, that empowers women through education and awareness
  • Empower women – a UN entity
  • World Pulse
  • Women’s economic empowerment
  • How Ananke is perceived by the male population in Dubai and UAE’s vision about gender equality, inclusion and diversity.
  • Patriarchal societies.
  • The importance of collaboration

More about Sabin Muzaffar

Sabin’s twitter: https://twitter.com/critoe
Ananke’s twitter: https://twitter.com/anankemag

More about PAVE

Twitter.com/pave_podcast

Sponsors

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to collaborate with us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.co

Activism, Feminism, Gender Equality, Patriarchy, PAVE Podcast, UN women, Women's rights

PAVE 004: UNwomen, CSW and International Womens Day with Ravi Karkara

Ravi Karkara is a Senior Advisor on Strategic Partnerships and Advocacy to the Assistant Secretary General to the UN and Deputy Executive Director at UN Women. With over two decades of experience, Ravi is an expert in various international development-related fields, driving innovation, building strategic partnerships, and promoting advocacy and programming in the areas of human rights, gender equality, accountability and social justice. He is also the Acting Head of Private Sector for UN Women.
  Ravi has been instrumental in supporting UN Women’s work on strategy development – this includes Strategy on Youth and Gender Equality, Working with Boys and Men in Gender Equality.
He has been awarded the Global Officials Award for his work on youth and gender equality and the Inter-Faith Award on promoting peace and harmony. He was also appointed as Junior Chamber International Ambassador.  Previously, he has also worked with the UN Millennium Campaign, UN-HABITAT, UNICEF and Save the Children and has written more than 80 publications/articles in his career spanning over two decades.

Topics discussed and organisations/events mentioned in this episode:

  • CSW – Commission status of women
  • International Women’s day
  • Life Cycle perspective to empower young women
  • Balancing private life
  • Working in gender equality is to transform both femininity and masculinity
  • Being a male feminist
  • Transforming patriarchy

More about Ravi Karkara

More about PAVE

Twitter.com/pave_podcast

Sponsors

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to collaborate with us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

Activism, Feminism, Gender Equality, Interview, Patriarchy, PAVE Podcast, UN women, Women's rights